


The Captains are Idiots

by Embones



Series: Volleyball Idiot Chatfics [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Chaos, Chatting & Messaging, Confessions, Confusion, Getting Together, How Do I Tag, M/M, Misunderstandings, No one is in a relationship yet, Pining, Swearing, Teru is a lonely trash man, Texting, Volleyball Dorks in Love, but we love him, no beta we die like daichi, what has my life come to
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29123085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Embones/pseuds/Embones
Summary: Kuroo added Bokuto, Daichi, and (5) more to the chatKuroo changed the chat name toThe captains of GAYKuroo:so, you've finally arrived-Kuroo:what the hell are you wearing?Oikawa:it's my ass kicking outfit BITCHDaichi:what have you done---This is just a random captains chatfic that I plan on filling with nonsense that I think about at 3am. There will be some plot and a TON of pining. Hope you like it!
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Aone Takanobu/Futakuchi Kenji, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kita Shinsuke/Ojiro Aran, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Series: Volleyball Idiot Chatfics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2136960
Comments: 76
Kudos: 143
Collections: Chatfics I simp for





	1. The start of something terrible

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Which one is better? Continuing an ongoing fic or starting something else entirely because your brain said so? Apparently, it's the second one. Anyways, I hope you guys like this. It'll mostly just be nonsense, but there will be some plot. Enjoy!

_Kuroo added Bokuto, Daichi, and (5) more to the chat_  
_Kuroo changed the chat name to **The captains of GAY**_  
4:28 pm

**Kuroo:** so, you've finally arrived-  
 **Kuroo:** what the hell are you wearing?

 **Oikawa:** it's my ass kicking outfit BITCH

 **Daichi:** what have you done

 **Terushima:** I'm bi tyvm

 **Bokuto:** BRO

 **Kuroo:** BRO

 **Futakuchi:** the hell is this?  
**Futakuchi:** and why am I here?

 **Ushijima:** I would also like to know why I am here.

 **Oikawa:** ew proper grammer  
**Oikawa:** ew ushiwaka

 **Kita:** What's wrong with proper grammer?

 **Oikawa:** nothing  
**Oikawa:** I just don't like ushiwaka

 **Kuroo:** is that everyone?

 **Futakuchi:** you tell us

 **Terushima:** AYE SECOND YEAR SQUAD

 **Futakuchi:** yea, no

 **Kita:** Kuroo, will you please explain why we are all here?

 **Bokuto:** YEA BRO  
**Bokuto:** DONT LEAVE US HANGING

 **Daichi:** Bokuto, please turn your caps off

 **Bokuto:** oh sorry  
**Bokuto:** kaashi usually reminds me

 **Oikawa:** ANYGAYS

 **Terushima:** still bi

 **Futakuchi:** literally no one asked

 **Terushima:** rude

 **Futakuchi:** and?

 **Daichi:** SHUT UP SO KUROO CAN EXPLAIN

 **Kuroo:** wow ok  
**Kuroo:** so, this is a chat with a bunch of team captains in it  
**Kuroo:** I thought it'd be cool to hang out, even if we can't in person

 **Oikawa:** that's.. kinda sweet

 **Futakuchi:** can I leave?

 **Ushijima:** Will volleyball be a topic of discussion?

 **Kita:** Thank you for thinking of me, though I must go now  
**Kita:** Practice is starting back up

 **Daichi:** same, Suga's staring in confusion

 **Terushima:** you sure it's just confusion, my guy?

 **Daichi:** yes, goodbye

 **Bokuto:** THATS SO COOL

 **Kuroo:** thank you all for your words of praise, but I must be on my way  
**Kuroo:** for my lovely kitten is calling me

 **Terushima:** kitten, huh?

 **Bokuto:** his setter, Kenma

 **Kuroo:** touch him and you will loose a hand

 **Futakuchi:** possessive much?

 **Kuroo:** that wasn't a threat, it was a warning  
**Kuroo:** Kenma would remove your hand himself  
**Kuroo:** shit, gotta go!

 **Bokuto:** SEE YA, BRO!!

 **Oikawa:** Iwa~chan is threatening me! T^T

 **Bokuto:** Iwa-chan?

 **Oikawa:** ew, stop  
**Oikawa:** only I get to call him that

 **Terushima:** oh? does the pretty setter have a crush?

 **Oikawa:** more than a crush, definitely

 **Terushima:** a boyfriend??

 **Oikawa:** I wish!

 **Bokuto:** Im lost.. whos Iwa-chan?

 **Oikawa:** stop, just stop  
**Oikawa:** his name is Iwaizumi Hajime and he is the best ace in all of the Miyagi prefecture

 **Ushijima:** I disagree. I believe that I hold that title, as I am the number three ace in Japan. Your "Iwa-chan" isn't anywhere close to me on the rankings.

 **Terushima:** well damn

 **Oikawa:** next time I see you, it's on sight

 **Ushijima:** What is on sight? Are you finally coming to Shiratorizawa? 

**Oikawa:** someone hold me back or istg this man is dead

 **Bokuto:** kaashi is calling me! BYE!!

 **Terushima:** this is wild

 **Oikawa:** Iwa~chan is still being mean T^T  
**Oikawa:** shit he caught me staring at his arms-

 **Terushima:** go get your mans

 **Ushijima:** I am very confused.  
**Ushijima:** I will go ask Tendou for help.

\---

** The captains of GAY **  
7:53 pm

**Ushijima:** You should've come to Shiratorizawa.

 **Oikawa:** FUCK YOU USHIWAKA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is shorter than most of the future chapters will be (I hope). Official introductions will be in the next chapter, along with your daily dose of chaos. I don't really have an updating schedule and this might end up being shit, but I still hope you guys like this. 
> 
> Have a good day!


	2. Introductions and nicknames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone officially introduces themselves and Oikawa gives everyone a nickname. Not even Kita is spared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is going to be (hopefully) much longer than the last one. Sorry if any of the characters seem too ooc, I'm still trying to get the hang of this. I don't know very much about Kita, so he might not be here as much as the others, and he might be WAY more ooc than the others. Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

** The captains of GAY **  
7:14 am

**Kita:** I don't believe we did introductions yesterday  
 **Kita:** I know most of you, but I there are a few I don't quite recognize

 **Bokuto:** SAME

**Kuroo:** oh, yea  
**Kuroo:** they never went to nationals

**Oikawa:** wow, just pour salt on the wound

**Futakuchi:** as far as I'm concerned, none of you exist

**Ushijima:** If we do not exist in your mind, then why are you texting us?

**Terushima** HAH

**Futakuchi:** I hate it here

**Bokuto:** I'LL START  
**Bokuto:** BOKUTO KOUTAROU, 3RD YEAR, ACE AND CAPTAIN OF FUKURODANI

**Daichi:** we're all captains

**Bokuto:** oh

**Oikawa:** me next!  
**Oikawa:** Oikawa Tooru, 3rd year, setter for Aoba Johsai!

**Ushijima:** Ushijima Wakatoshi, 3rd year, ace of Shiratorizawa.

**Oikawa:** ew, Shiratorizawa

**Terushima:** Terushima Yuuji, 2nd year, wing spiker (not ace) for Johzenji

**Daichi:** Sawamura Daichi, 3rd year, wing spiker (also not ace) for Karasuno

**Futakuchi:** do I really have to do this

**Kuroo:** yes

**Futakuchi:** ugh  
**Futakuchi:** Futakuchi Kenji, 2nd year, ace and member of the iron wall for Date Tech

**Kita:** I will go next, as I am the one who recommended this  
**Kita:** Kita Shinsuke, 3rd year, wing spiker for Inarizaki

**Kuroo:** guess I'll go last  
**Kuroo:** Kuroo Testurou, 3rd year, middle blocker for Nekoma

**Kita:** Thank you

**Kuroo:** np, man

**Daichi:** we should all get ready for school now

**Oikawa:** ok dad

**Daichi:** I- what-

**Oikawa:** ;P

**Futakuchi:** I hate it here

**Ushijima:** I believe you have said that before.

**Terushima:** I can't tell if he's being a smartass or if this is just how he is

**Kita:** I've learned to not question it 

**Kuroo:** you say that as if you're best buds or something

**Kita:** We've been to nationals together almost every year of our high school lives, we were bound to converse at some point

**Oikawa:** just rub it in, why dontcha :(

**Kuroo:** where'd Bokubro go?

**Daichi:** you're probably the only one who would know

**Bokuto:** SORRY, KAASHI CALLED ME TO REMIND ME ABOUT MORNING PRACTICE THAT IM VERY LATE FOR

**Terushima:** go get 'em, tiger

**Bokuto:** huh?

**Kuroo:** nothing, just go bro

**Bokuto:** OK BRO

**Daichi:** everyone else should go too

**Ushijima:** Why would we all go to Bokuto's practice? Isn't Fukurodani in Tokyo?

**Oikawa:** this is great XD

**Terushima:** no one tell him

**Ushijima:** Did I say something funny?

**Kuroo:** I thought I was going to regret making this chat, but I'm already loving it here

**Kita:** I can hear your hyena laugh from here, Kuroo

**Kuroo:** ouch

**Daichi:** EVERYONE OFFLINE  
**Daichi:** thank you

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
11:31 am

**Oikawa** changed **Daichi** 's name to **thighs**

**Oikawa** changed **Kuroo** 's name to **bedhead**

**Oikawa** changed **Bokuto** 's name to **bokkun**

**Oikawa** changed **Futakuchi** 's name to **Salt™**

**Oikawa** changed **Terushima** 's name to **sexy kouhai**

**Oikawa** changed **Ushijima** 's name to **trash**

**Oikawa** changed **Kita** 's name to **kita-san**

**Oikawa** changed **Oikawa** 's name to **aliens are real**

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
1:48 pm

**Salt™** changed **aliens are real** 's name to **oinks**

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
5:12 pm

**oinks:** hey! :(

**Salt™:** you started it

**bokkun:** HEY HEY HEY!!

**bedhead:** I feel attacked

**bokkun:** BRO XD

**bedhead:** bro.. I thought you were on my side..

**bokkun:** im sorry bro, you know i didnt mean it

**bedhead:** ily bro

**bokkun:** ilyt bro

**thighs:** why? just why?

**oinks:** have you even seen yourself?  
**oinks:** your thighs are a masterpiece 

**thighs:** thank you..?

**sexy kouhai:** finally, my beauty has been recognized

**oinks:** it's the tongue piercing 

**sexy kouhai:** I'll take what I can get

**kita-san:** Thank you for giving me a decent nickname

**trash:** Why is my name "trash"? I am not trash.

**oinks:** you guys hear something?

**Salt™:** you can't hear a text, so no

**sexy kouhai:** he's got you there, oinks

**Salt™:** stop talking like we're friends, cause we're not

**sexy kouhai:** aww, why not? I thought we were the second year squad :(

**Salt™:** no

**sexy kouhai:** :(((

**kita-san:** If I may ask, why did you give us nicknames, Oikawa?

**oinks:** I got bored and Iwa~chan was yelling at me for practicing too long again

**kita-san:** In the middle of class?

**oinks:** lunch break

**bedhead:** all I heard was "Iwa-chan was aggressively caring for me"

**bokkun:** GOOD ONE BRO

**oinks:** 1\. don't call him Iwa~chan  
**oinks:** 2\. shut up

**trash:** I am still waiting on an answer to my question, Oikawa.

**oinks:** because you suck

**trash:** I do not understand. How do I suck?

**sexy kouhai:** XD

**Salt™:** dirty-minded creep

**sexy kouhai:** the fact that you knew what I was thinking proves that you are ALSO a "dirty-minded creep"

**bedhead:** he's not wrong, my guy

**bokkun:** LOL

**Salt™:** I hate it here

**thighs:** you guys are living disasters 

**oinks:** GAY disasters

**sexy kouhai:** again, I'm bi

**bedhead:** come over bro

**bokkun:** anything for you bro

**bedhead:** thanks bro

**bokkun:** np bro  
**bokkun:** be over soon bro

**trash:** Come over, Oikawa.

**oinks:** wtf, no

**kita-san:** Don't you live in the Shiratorizawa dorms, Ushijima?

**trash:** Yes, I do. I'm offering Oikawa a place at Shiratorizawa. 

**oinks:** FUCK YOU USHIWAKA

**sexy kouhai:** damn, 3rd years are scary

**Salt™:** lol

**sexy kouhai:** GASP  
**sexy kouhai:** I made the saltshaker laugh!

**Salt™:** I was actually laughing at Oikawa's suffering

**oinks:** wow, ok

**sexy kouhai:** damn

**kita-san:** Is it just me, or did Kuroo seem off?

**thighs:** yea, kinda dejected

**sexy kouhai:** woah, big words

**trash:** How do I change my name?

**oinks:** you don't

**kita-san:** Should one of us PM him? I know that Bokuto is with him, but neither of them are very good at dealing with their emotions. 

**thighs:** I doubt he'll listen, but I'll give it a shot

**sexy kouhai:** how are you guys so responsible?

**kita-san:** What do you mean? I'm just trying to be a good friend

**thighs:** I guess it comes with being a captain?

**sexy kouhai:** but I'm a captain and I never act like that????

**Salt™:** cause you're a shit captain

**sexy kouhai:** hey! I don't see YOU being all caring!

**Salt™:** that's because I just don't care

**oinks:** hence, the nickname

**Salt™:** whatever

\---

Private messages between **Daichi** and **Kuroo**.  
6:42 pm

**Daichi:** hey, you ok?  
 **Daichi:** Kita and I noticed that you seemed a bit off in the gc

 **Kuroo:** yea, I'm good  
**Kuroo:** thanks for asking

**Daichi:** you're obviously lying, but I won't force you  
**Daichi:** just know that we're here if you want to talk

**Kuroo:** you really are a dad

**Daichi:** ugh, stop

**Kuroo:** lol, fine  
**Kuroo:** thanks again

**Daichi:** np

\---

Private messages between **Daichi** and **Kita**.  
7:03 pm

**Daichi:** I talked to Kuroo  
 **Daichi:** he said that nothing was wrong, which was an obvious lie that I called him out for, and I let him know that he could talk to us if he needed anything

 **Kita:** Thank you for updating me. 

**Daichi:** np

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2 chapters in one day? Wow! Lol, I'm so weird. Anyway, I hope you guys liked this one. I'll start my setters chatfic soon (probably today, knowing myself). I'm not entirely sure what to say, so.... yea.
> 
> Have a good day!


	3. The first official gay panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crushes will be revealed. Ridiculous pining will ensue, as will chaos. Daichi adopts more children.
> 
> I suck at summaries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you guys forgot (because I know I will), here are their nicknames: 
> 
> Daichi - thighs  
> Bokuto - bokkun  
> Kuroo - bedhead  
> Oikawa - oinks  
> Futakuchi - Salt™  
> Terushima - sexy kouhai  
> Kita - kita-san  
> Ushijima - trash

** The captains of GAY **   
2:45 am

**oinks:** I have an idea!

 **Salt™:** go tf to sleep 

**sexy kouhai:** no u

**Salt™:** I hate it here

**kita-san:** What is your idea, Oikawa?

**thighs:** why are you all still awake?

**bedhead:** you're no better, dad

**bokkun:** yea dad

**thighs:** I'm not your dad

**bedhead:** lol, we got you to meme

**bokkun:** LOLOLOLOL HE MEMED

**oinks:** ANYGAYS

**sexy kouhai:** why are we here.. just to suffer?

**oinks:** we should all reveal who we have crushes on!

**Salt™:** no

**kita-san:** Can't this wait until morning? I would like to sleep

**oinks:** but I'm boooredddd ;(((

**Salt™:** then go annoy your "Iwa-chan" and leave us alone

**oinks:** stop calling him that!

**sexy kouhai:** aww, he said "us"  
**sexy kouhai:** I feel so loved

**Salt™:** I will spike you into the sun

**sexy kouhai:** ;(

**thighs:** if we do this, will you let us sleep?

**oinks:** yep!

**thighs:** ughhhhhhh fine

**oinks:** yay! I'll go first!

**bedhead:** I thought you were better than this, dad

**bokkun:** im so disappointed dad

**kita-san:** I don't think Daichi likes being referred to as your father figure

**thighs:** thank you, Kita

**oinks:** guyssssssss

**bedhead:** you wanna know what I think, bro?

**bokkun:** WHAT IS IT BRO?

**bedhead:** I think Kita's jealous bro

**bokkun:** HOW SO BRO?

**bedhead:** I think Kita wants to be the dad bro

**bokkun:** THATS SO SMART BRO

**kita-san:** Please do not start calling me "dad". I am not your father

**bedhead:** Daichi's more of a dad anyway

**bokkun:** YEA BRO

**thighs:** Bokuto, caps

**bokkun:** sorry

**bedhead:** exhibit a

**oinks:** GUYS

**sexy kouhai:** lol get ignored

**kita-san:** My apologies, Oikawa. You may continue

**bedhead:** go ahead, bro

**bokkun:** i thought i was your bro..

**bedhead:** I'm sorry bro, you are the best bro I could ever ask for

**bokkun:** ily bro

**bedhead:** ilyt bro

**Salt™:** someone PLEASE shut them up

**oinks:** stop ignoring me!!

**thighs:** EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LET OIKAWA SPEAK

**oinks:** thank you  
**oinks:** so, we're going to say who we like and one reason why we like them! we can bond over our hopeless love lives later, just so I don't get murdered tonight!

**sexy kouhai:** sounds good, who's first?

**kita-san:** I will go first  
**kita-san:** I have feelings for Ojiro Aran, and I admire his strength on and off the court

**oinks:** I like Iwa~chan! He's really mean sometimes, but I know that's just his way of caring for me!

**thighs:** I've liked Suga for a while, he's really sweet

**sexy kouhai:** sweet, huh? ( ͡° ͜ ʖ ͡° )

**bedhead:** BAHAHAHA

**bokkun:** HES GOT YOU THERE DAD

**thighs:** I'm too tired for this

**oinks:** NEXT

**bedhead:** I'm hopelessly in love with my kitten, Kenma  
**bedhead:** his observation skills are very admirable

**bokkun:** I DONT LIKE ANYONE

**Salt™:** I don't even know you and I can tell that's not true

**sexy kouhai:** what about that "kaashi" guy? you seemed into him

**bokkun:** KAASHI IS MY SETTER

**oinks:** "my setter"

**bedhead:** sorry to break it to you bro, but you're in love with Akaashi

**bokkun:** i am?

**Salt™:** this is painful to watch

**bedhead:** yes, you are

**bokkun:** OH SHIT  
**bokkun:** IM IN LOVE WITH KAASHI

**thighs:** congrats, you're officially the last one to know

**bokkun:** daaaaaad  
**bokkun:** WAIT  
**bokkun:** DOES THAT MEAN THAT KAASHI KNOWS?!

**bedhead:** I think you're safe bro

**bokkun:** PHEW

**oinks:** NEXT

**sexy kouhai:** unlike bokkun here, I actually don't have a crush rn

**Salt™:** it's not like anyone would want you anyway

**sexy kouhai:** ouch

**oinks:** really???

**kita-san:** Understandable, feelings are difficult

**sexy kouhai:** yep, no one's really caught my eye 

**bedhead:** it's the saltshaker's turn now

**Salt™:** no

**oinks:** you have to!

**Salt™:** I don't have to do shit

**thighs:** istg Futakuchi

**Salt™:** fine

**bedhead:** lol, even dad is done with your saltiness

**kita-san** Kuroo, please shut up

**bedhead:** fine, but ONLY because you asked nicely 

**oinks:** SALT  
**oinks:** GO

**Salt™:** chill, it's not even that big of a deal  
**Salt™:** Aone's cool ig  
**Salt™:** he's a good listener

**oinks:** the huge guy with no eyebrows and white hair?

**Salt™:** call him "huge guy" one more time, and I will make sure you never see your precious "Iwa-chan" again

**oinks:** wow, ok

**sexy kouhai:** damn, who knew Mr. Salt could get all protective

**Salt™:** you're next, bitch

**kita-san:** I think now would be a good time for everyone to go to sleep. You all seem aggravated and I can feel Daichi's tired anger from here

**bedhead:** night  
**bedhead:** Bo says "SLEEP WELL BROS"

**oinks:** byeeee~

**Salt™:** I'm not saying goodnight to you all

**sexy kouhai:** aww, why not?

**thighs:** SLEEP

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
8:13 am

**bokkun:** HOW DO I ACT AROUND KAASHI NOW THAT I LIKE HIM?

 **oinks:** my time as a matchmaker has come!

**Salt™:** stfu oinkawa

**oinks:** rude!

**thighs:** just be yourself

**bedhead:** yea bro  
**bedhead:** there's no need to act any different than you usually do

**bokkun:** REALLY?

**kita-san:** Bokuto, please refrain from using caps so often

**bokkun:** sorry im just nervous

**trash:** I am confused.

**oinks:** ugh, he's back

**trash:** I never left, I was just asleep.

**oinks:** and I wish you would've stayed that way

**trash:** I believe that implies that you wish I was dead.

**oinks:** oh, no! why would I ever think that?

**trash:** Well, you do not seem to like me very much. That may be a reason.

**Salt™:** that was sarcasm, you bonehead

**trash:** Oh, Tendou has been teaching me more about sarcasm. 

**oinks:** jfc someone please hit me in the face with a volleyball

**kita-san:** Don't say that, Oikawa. He's trying

**bokkun:** do you think kaashi will be upset if i try to hold his hand??

**thighs:** I think you should try to figure your feelings out more before making a move

**bokkun:** what is there to figure out?  
**bokkun:** I love kaashi!

**kita-san:** I believe what Daichi is getting at, is that maybe you should take some time to let your feelings sink in. Figure out what loving him means. Focus on yourself for a while. 

**thighs:** wow, thank you

**bokkun:** YOU GUYS ARE SO SMART  
**bokkun:** THANK YOU BUT I GOTTA GO, KAASHI'S CALLING!

**kita-san:** He's not going to listen to us, is he?

**thighs:** probably not

**trash:** He does not seem like the type of person so follow instructions easily, so I doubt he will follow yours. 

**oinks:** just go

**trash:** I will go now.

**oinks:** did he just-

**kita-san:** I should go too, good bye

**thighs:** same here, bye

**oinks:** I am  
**oinks:** in shock

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
11:24 am

**Salt™:** that moment when the subject of your hopeless pining made you a bento box and you just make a joke about how much of a housewife he is instead of admitting to the fact that he just sent you into a full-blown gay panic

 **sexy kouhai:** wow, you have feelings?

**Salt™:** I'm never telling any of you anything ever again

**sexy kouhai:** aww

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
3:09 pm

**bedhead:** damn, I missed salty's gay panic

 **Salt™:** no, it's still here  
**Salt™:** especially because HE KEEPS FUCKING LOOKING AT ME 

**bedhead:** aw, young love

**Salt™:** fuck off

**bedhead:** now, now, tell papa Kuroo why you're so gay for this man

**Salt™:** I just gagged  
**Salt™:** never call yourself "papa" ever again

**bedhead:** fine, tell daddy what's bothering you 

**Salt™:** I might be crying rn if I wasn't sitting in the middle of class and gay panicking like it's the end of the fucking world

**bedhead:** fine, I'll stop  
**bedhead:** are the lunch and the looks the only thing messing with you?

**Salt™:** well, he spoke to me  
**Salt™:** he doesn't talk often, and it's usually only when I'm around anyway  
**Salt™:** but this was different

**bedhead:** how so?

**Salt™:** for one, his voice is like heaven  
**Salt™:** he also may or may not have told me that he made the lunch HIMSELF

**bedhead:** oh, it's THAT kind of gay panic

**Salt™:** what's that supposed to mean?

**bedhead:** just that you should definitely confess before he does

**Salt™:** no

**bedhead:** why not?? he's definitely interested  
**bedhead:** hello?  
**bedhead:** Futakuchi?  
**bedhead:** did I really scare him of with that one sentence???

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
6:43 pm

**thighs:** oh, wow  
 **thighs:** Futakuchi, you ok?

 **Salt™:** no, thank you for asking

**thighs:** Kuroo's an idiot, but I agree with him on this one  
**thighs:** I think you should confess, or Aone might beat you to it

**bedhead:** hey! I give great advice!

**kita-san:** Do you remember when you convinced Atsumu that an onion was an orange, so he started peeling it into slices and ate it? Do you remember cleaning everyone's futons after he got sick?

**bedhead:** that was ONE time

**thighs:** tokyo training camp  
**thighs:** and I know you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about

**bedhead:** FINE! I make poor choices, I get it

**Salt™:** 1\. don't say his name, it makes my feelings too real  
**Salt™:** 2\. confessing is out of the question  
**Salt™:** 3\. Kuroo IS an idiot, but thank you for the blackmail

**thighs:** we're not going to pressure you into doing anything, just give it some thought

**Salt™:** fine, I'll think about it

**bedhead:** I was unaware that we had a new brother, dad

**thighs:** what..?

**kita-san:** I think he is referring to your show of affection towards Futakuchi

**oinks:** WHY WASN'T I INVITED TO MY KOUHAI'S GAY PANIC?!?!?!

**Salt™:** don't call me "your kouhai"  
**Salt™:** also, because of your fondness for Terushima, I refuse to tell you anything  
**Salt™:** good bye

**oinks:** noooooooooo ;(((

**thighs:** I should go too, I haven't eaten dinner yet  
**thighs:** see ya

**kita-san:** Farewell

**bedhead:** bye

**oinks:** guys??  
**oinks:** don't leave me!  
**oinks:** you're all bullies!

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
9:48 pm

**oinks:** SEND HELP  
 **oinks:** I'M BEING CHASED BY AN ANGRY YAHABA

 **sexy kouhai:** who?

**thighs:** the other setter on Seijoh  
 **thighs:** I'm sure Oikawa's fine

**oinks:** HDFIWNMPSAJKDINCIEWP

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't actually know anything about Aran, but I've seen some stuff including that ship and thought it was cute. Same goes for Kita. I'm not all caught up on the series.
> 
> For anyone confused about the ending, see my new setters chatfic for context! Yes, I finally made it! Hope you guys like both these stories. They are both in the same universe, so many crossovers will take place. 
> 
> Have a good day!


	4. Things get real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mornings are for chaos. Teru's tired. The chat room is tense. Daichi is stupid (not really, he just makes a mistake).
> 
> I suck at summaries, as always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things do get serious for a bit, but I hope you like it anyway. It will get better, I promise.
> 
> Reminder of the names, in case you forgot! (because I know I will)
> 
> Daichi - thighs  
> Bokuto - bokkun  
> Kuroo - bedhead  
> Oikawa - oinks  
> Futakuchi - Salt™  
> Terushima - sexy kouhai  
> Kita - kita-san  
> Ushijima - trash

** The captains of GAY **   
7:49 am

**bedhead:** I'm being ignored again T^T

 **bokkun:** stay strong bro

 **bedhead:** thanks bro

 **thighs:** Suga just ran into practice looking exhausted, and he's late  
**thighs:** Oikawa, do you know what happened? I know you two are kinda close

 **bokkun:** DO YOU THINK OIKS IS ACTUALLY HURT?!

 **thighs:** I hope not, Seijoh is nothing but chaos without their captain

 **Salt™:** it's chaos no matter what

 **thighs:** yea, but at least it's controlled chaos with him around

 **bedhead:** someone distract me from my sadness

 **trash:** I'm not sure if this will be a good distraction, but how does one get a 16-year-old off of a roof?

 **bokkun:** IM SORRY WHATSIDJCOEINC

 **thighs:** details, now

 **trash:** Shirabu was supposed to be practicing with Goshiki. Instead, Goshiki is on the roof of the gym and Semi is chasing Shirabu around the school grounds with a blocking board. Also, Tendou won't stop laughing.

 **bedhead:** best distraction ever XD

 **thighs:** wow, your team is almost as chaotic as mine

 **bedhead:** almost?

 **thighs:** don't ask

 **trash:** I still require assistance. 

**thighs:** just give them the Disapproving Dad™ look

 **trash:** I don't understand. What is the Disapproving Dad™ look?

 **bedhead:** just say "I'm disappointed" and they'll stop

 **trash:** Thank you, I will go try that now.

 **bokkun:** I DROPPED MY PHONE T^T

 **bedhead:** nice change of subject, bro

 **bokkun:** THANKS BRO

 **thighs:** go back to practice, you two

 **bokkun:** I DONT HAVE PRACTICE TODAY!

 **bedhead:** but Kenma is ignoring me T^T

 **thighs:** then go study, Bokuto

 **bokkun:** but I'm so bad at studying! and kaashi is busy!

 **thighs:** then figure something else out, but I'm leaving

 **bokkun:** BYE DAD

 **bedheads:** bro, dad just totally ignored me

 **bokkun:** WOAH YOURE RIGHT BRO

 **bedhead:** KENMA'S OFF HIS GAMES, BYE!!!

 **bokkun:** SEE YA BRO

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
10:54 am

**sexy kouhai:** the name of this chat haunts me  
 **sexy kouhai:** like, is my bisexuality not valid? am I not valid?  
 **sexy kouhai:** I always get asked shit like "oh, so you're gay?" or "that means you could still be straight, right?"  
 **sexy kouhai:** no one ever thinks about how those little comments make me feel  
 **sexy kouhai:** most people assume I'm straight, but that's just because they don't know me  
 **sexy kouhai:** sometimes I feel like my teammates are the only ones who actually understand me

 **kita-san:** Terushima, are you okay? Do you need someone to talk to?

 **sexy kouhai:** I'm fine, I just need sleep  
**sexy kouhai:** I'm on my fourth cup of coffee this morning and it's making me think too much

 **kita-san:** Are you sure? I'm always available if you need someone

 **sexy kouhai:** thanks, I think I'm just gonna go now 

**kita-san:** Alright, take care

 **oinks:** I CAN'T BELIEVE NONE OF YOU THOUGHT TO CHECK ON ME  
**oinks:** I WAS CLEARLY NOT OKAY  
**oinks:** wait, why is Teru sad? 

**kita-san:** To be fair, we assumed you were just being dramatic. That is usually the case, after all.  
**kita-san:** Also, he said he was just tired. I doubt that is the real reason behind these thoughts though. 

**oinks:** RUDE  
**oinks:** and I'll check on him later, cause that's what a good senpai does!

 **kita-san:** You should check on him because he's feeling down, and you wish to help. Not because you think it will improve your image.

 **oinks:** true, true

 **kita-san:** Do you actually understand though?

 **oinks:** of course!

 **Salt™:** is that idiot seriously hyping himself up on coffee like that?

 **kita-san:** I believe that is what he implied, yes

 **oinks:** ew, you sound like ushiwaka  
**oinks:** it's giving me a headache  
**oinks:** that could just be the concussion though

 **Salt™:** stfu oinkawa and think about someone else for a change

 **kita-san:** I thought you didn't like Terushima? Did I misunderstand?

 **Salt™:** he's a fucking dumbass, but that doesn't mean that I hate him 

**oinks:** aww, the babies are bonding!

 **kita-san:** Now is not a good time, Oikawa

 **Salt™:** you are probably the last person he would want to talk to, so I suggest you let me check on him

 **kita-san:** Are you talking to me or Oikawa?

 **Salt™:** oinkawa, obviously

 **oinks:** rude

 **Salt™:** says the most self-centered prick of all time

 **kita-san:** I don't think insults are necessary, Futakuchi

 **oinks:** I'll have you know that I care very much for the people around me!

 **Salt™:** sure, all of - what? - 5 people?  
**Salt™:** you probably chased the rest of them off with your careless bullshit  
**Salt™:** and we all know you only care about Iwaizumi

 **kita-san:** You're going to say something that you're going to regret later on

 **oinks:** you don't know ANYTHING about me  
**oinks:** YOU of all people don't get to judge me, Mr. "I'm gonna act like a shit person so people don't get too close and leave me"  
**oinks:** I've seen your type many times before  
**oinks:** hell, I'm on a team with someone like that

 **Salt™:** I won't deny it, I'm terrified of people leaving me  
**Salt™:** but you don't have the right to judge me for that because you don't know why I think that way  
**Salt™:** especially when you're just as afraid, if not more so, of Iwaizumi leaving you too  
**Salt™:** you're scared that he's going to leave you because of your feelings

 **kita-san:** That's enough, you two

 **Salt™:** no, it's not! this asshole is so stuck-up and he doesn't even realize it!

 **oinks:** you really think I'm stupid enough to not realize my own flaws?!

 **kita-san:** Both of you shut up! I'm done watching you two go at each other's throats like this. Turn off your phones and calm down. You can apologize later.

 **Salt™:** as if I'd apologize to him, when he clearly deserved it!

 **oinks:** if anything, YOU'RE the one who doesn't deserve an apology!

 **kita-san:** Off. Now.

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
3:16 pm

**bokkun:** GUYS  
 **bokkun:** WHY IS MY KAASHI SO PRETTY?!?!?!

 **thighs:** he's not "yours", Bokuto

 **bokkun:** BUT HES SO PRETTYYYYYYYY

 **thighs:** that doesn't change the fact that he doesn't belong to you

 **bokkun:** I know..  
**bokkun:** I don't want him to belong to me anyway, I want him to be my equal!

 **thighs:** that's.. surprisingly considerate

 **bokkun:** THANKS

 **bedhead:** so, we're just gonna ignore all that stuff from earlier?

 **kita-san:** Bring it up. I dare you.

 **bedhead:** moving on-

 **kita-san:** Good idea

 **bokkun:** how do I tell kaashi how pretty he is without him thinking that Im weird???

 **bedhead:** same way you always do

 **thighs:** I doubt he would think you were weird anyway

 **bokkun:** EUFHODINFOIWFE  
**bokkun:** GUYS HE JUST GOT PRETTIER

 **bedhead:** I don't know what I'd do if Kenma got any prettier  
**bedhead:** he's already absolutely adorable

 **thighs:** let's not make this about ourselves, Kuroo

 **bokkun:** YEA  
**bokkun:** THIS IS MY GAY PANIC

 **bedhead:** sorry, bro

 **bokkun:** its ok bro

 **bedhead:** ily bro

 **bokkun:** ilyt bro

 **thighs:** why..?

 **bokkun:** anyways I SAW KAASHI SMILE

 **bedhead:** woah, that's rare

 **bokkun:** I KNOW

 **bedhead:** you should go make him smile some more bro

 **bokkun:** ILL TRY BRO

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
5:23 pm

**thighs:** sorry for disappearing earlier  
 **thighs:** Yui asked me out, and I guess I have a girlfriend now

 **trash:** I am confused. I thought you had romantic feelings for your setter, Sugawara Koushi. 

**thighs:** I do, but I'm tired of pining after someone who will never return my feelings

 **trash:** I am not very good with social cues or feelings, but Sugawara seemed to be very interested in you when I last saw him. It was quite recent, as well. 

**thighs:** 1\. I doubt that  
**thighs:** 2\. since when did you know Suga??? and why are you hanging out with him???

 **trash:** He came to Shiratorizawa to meet with one of our setters, Semi Eita. They seemed to be close friends. 

**thighs:** oh, looks like I made the right choice then

 **trash:** I disagree, but it is not my place to comment on your personal affairs. 

**thighs:** well, I'm gonna go

 **trash:** Good bye, Daichi.

 **thighs:** see ya

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
8:42 pm

**bedhead:** Daichi, what the fuck?

 **thighs:** what?

 **bedhead:** don't give me any of that bs

 **thighs:** look, I don't need a lecture rn  
**thighs:** I just want to think about things and talk to my girlfriend

 **bedhead:** let me guess, Suga didn't take the news too well?

 **thighs:** he took it a little too well, actually  
**thighs:** I don't want to talk about it though

 **bedhead:** fine  
**bedhead:** I know I'm a dumbass sometimes, but you can talk to me if you need to

 **thighs:** sometimes?

 **bedhead:** ok, most of the time

 **thighs:** that's better, and thanks

 **bedhead:** np, man  
**bedhead:** take care

 **thighs:** you too

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
11:22 pm

**oinks:** I wsnt Iwa~chan to slam me into a wall like Yahaba did to Kyoutani  
 **oinks:** his arms would be perfect for it

 **bedhead:** wsnt

 **bokkun:** wsnt

 **trash:** I believe this is a form of mockery.  
**trash:** wsnt

 **oinks:** RUDE  
**oinks:** why can't I thirst in peace T^T

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit shorter than I would've liked it, because I'm really just setting up for future chapters. I know things went kinda downhill in this one, but they will get better I promise. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> Have a good day!


	5. Never-ending torture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BokuAka almost gets their shit together. Almost. Dadchi sort of explains some things. Futakuchi is going to kill Teru.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder of the names, in case you forgot! (because I know I will)
> 
> Bokuto - bokkun  
> Kuroo - bedhead  
> Kita - kita-san  
> Ushijima - trash  
> Oikawa - oinks  
> Futakuchi - Salt™  
> Terushima - sexy kouhai  
> Daichi - thighs

** The captains of GAY **   
8:45 am

**bokkun:** GUYS  
 **bokkun:** ITS VALENTINES DAY

 **Salt™:** ugh, don't remind me

 **kita-san:** Did something bad happen last Valentine's Day?

 **Salt™:** yes, something that I would like to forget

 **sexy kouhai:** did you kiss Aone or something?

 **Salt™:** no, worse

 **sexy kouhai:** well, shit

 **trash:** I have never understood Valentine's Day, nor do I wish to participate in the tradition. 

**oinks:** boooooringggggg  
**oinks:** I get so much chocolate from my fangirls, but I hate it  
**oinks:** I only want chocolates from my Iwa~chan! I don't even necessarily want chocolates, I just want him to like me!

 **Salt™:** I wrote him a love letter and forgot to sign it  
**Salt™:** luckily, he never found out it was me

 **sexy kouhai:** damn

 **kita-san:** That does not sound like it was a fun day for you

 **Salt™:** it wasn't

 **bedhead:** Bokuto woke me up with his stupid fucking texts about having an announcement  
**bedhead:** so everyone shut up and let him speak

 **sexy kouhai:** so rude ;(

 **bedhead:** exactly, now stfu and let me go back to sleep

 **bokkun:** THANKS BRO

 **kita-san:** I have a feeling that you aren't going to get a response

 **bokkun:** PROBABLY NOT SO ILL JUST GET TO IT

 **Salt™:** please do

 **bokkun:** IM GOING TO ASK OUT AKAASHI TODAY

 **oinks:** nope, no can do 

**bokkun:** why not???

 **oinks:** unless you plan to do it over text, like a wimp, you'll have to wait  
**oinks:** he's coming to Miyagi today

 **bokkun:** WHAT?! WHY?! IS MY KAASHI LEAVING ME?!?!?!

 **sexy kouhai:** tea time~

 **Salt™:** shut up, you're distracting from the show

 **sexy kouhai:** did the saltshaker imply that my beauty distracts him???

 **Salt™:** I was actually calling you annoying, but take it as you will

 **sexy kouhai:** rude!

 **trash:** Oikawa, why is Fukurodani's setter coming to Miyagi? Is there an event going on that I was unaware of? If so, I would like to invite Tendou. 

**oinks:** no, it's a setter thing  
**oinks:** none of you are invited, and it's staying that way

 **bokkun:** WHY DIDNT KAASHI TELL ME????

 **trash:** Does that mean that Semi and Shirabu are going as well?

 **Salt™:** please tell me Kogane is going to bother someone other than me and Aone for the day

 **kita-san:** Will Atsumu be joining you?

 **oinks:** I don't know, but I need to get ready  
**oinks:** bye!~

 **bokkun:** IM GONNA CALL HIM  
**bokkun:** MAYBE I CAN CONVICE HIM TO MEET UP WITH ME INSTEAD

 **Salt™:** don't you think that'd be selfish?  
**Salt™:** he's allowed to have a life outside of just you

 **sexy kouhai:** I wanna meet all the pretty setters ;(

 **bokkun:** YOUR RIGHT  
**bokkun:** UGHHHHHH

 **kita-san:** Hang in there, Bokuto. I'm sure you'll get your chance soon enough.

 **bokkun:** thanks kita T^T

 **trash:** I hope Semi and Shirabu have fun. I say this as their captain and friend.

 **Salt™:** that "guess monster" guy told you to say that, didn't he?

 **trash:** Yes, Tendou told me to say that.

 **sexy kouhai:** simp

 **trash:** What is a simp?

 **Salt™:** oh my god, you're hopeless  
**Salt™:** ask your boyfriend

 **trash:** I do not have a boyfriend, though.

 **Salt™:** nope, I'm done  
**Salt™:** farewell, fuckwits

 **sexy kouhai:** don't leave meeeeeeee

 **kita-san:** I think Futakuchi was referring to Tendou as your boyfriend, Ushijima

 **trash:** But he is not my boyfriend.

 **sexy kouhai:** brb, bestie's calling

 **kita-san:** I am not sure how to explain. Please ask Tendou for further guidance.

 **trash:** I will, thank you.

 **kita-san:** You're welcome

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
11:23 am

**thighs:** I think you should go for it, Bokuto  
 **thighs:** everyone is waiting for you two to get your shit together

 **bedhead:** do iiiiiiiit

 **bokkun:** THANKS GUYS

 **sexy kouhai:** you should set up a really romantic picnic date and ask him to be your boyfriend under the stars

 **thighs:** or you could take him out to the city and shop for a while before asking him 

**bedhead:** you could just call him  
**bedhead:** Akaashi doesn't seem like the kind of person to like grand gestures, but I've been wrong before

 **bokkun:** YOU ALL HAVE SUCH GREAT IDEAS  
**bokkun:** BUT I ALREADY KNOW WHAT IM GONNA DO

 **sexy kouhai:** do tell~

 **thighs:** oh?

 **bokkun:** YEA! IM GONNA GET HIM A BIG BOUQUET OF THESE REALLY PRETTY FLOWERS THAT REMIND ME OF HIM AND TAKE HIM TO THE PARK FOR STARGAZING CAUSE I KNOW HE REALLY LIKES IT

 **thighs:** that's sweet

 **sexy kouhai:** nice

 **bedhead:** bro, I'm swooning

 **bokkun:** THANKS BRO BUT MY HEART HAS ALREADY BEEN TAKEN

 **bedhead:** bro.. how could you?

 **bokkun:** im sorry bro..

 **bedhead:** I shall never be the same

 **thighs:** alright, cut it out

 **sexy kouhai:** I've never felt so single, and you guys aren't even dating

 **bedhead:** you should see it when Kenma and Akaashi are together  
**bedhead:** it's not fair how cute their platonic cuddles are 

**bokkun:** IT MAKES ME SO JEALOUS

 **thighs:** don't worry, you'll be able to cuddle with Akaashi soon

 **bokkun:** I DONT WANNA WAITTTTTT

 **bedhead:** it's ok, bro  
**bedhead:** I miss my pretty setter too

 **sexy kouhai:** you guys and your setters, jeez

 **thighs:** how can we not like our setters? have you seen them?

 **bedhead:** I hate to break it to you, but you no longer have simping privileges 

**sexy kouhai:** in case you've forgotten, you're a taken man

 **thighs:** trust me, I haven't  
**thighs:** Michimiya hasn't stopped texting me all day

 **bokkun:** does she not want you to call her by her given name?

 **thighs:** she definitely wants me to, I just don't feel comfortable with it  
**thighs:** I'm trying, for both our sakes, but it doesn't feel right

 **bedhead:** because you don't like her

 **thighs:** of course I like her, she's so nice

 **sexy kouhai:** but you don't LIKE her

 **bedhead:** your heart belongs to a certain silver-haired setter, and you know it

 **thighs:** I hate it when you're right

 **bokkun:** why are you with her if you dont like her?  
**bokkun:** that doesnt seem fair to either of you

 **thighs:** it's not, but I need to move on from these feelings

 **sexy kouhai:** why? he seemed interested in you last time I saw you two

 **thighs:** then you saw wrong  
**thighs:** he likes someone else, I saw them hanging out last week 

**bedhead:** did not expect that  
**bedhead:** do you know who it was?

 **thighs:** yea, some guy from his english class

 **sexy kouhai:** was he hot?

 **bedhead:** not the time

 **sexy kouhai:** right, right

 **bokkun:** what were they doing? it might be a misunderstanding

 **thighs:** he was definitely flirting with Suga  
**thighs:** I was gonna tell him to back off, but then they started holding hands  
**thighs:** I left after that

 **bedhead:** seriously? you just walked away?

 **thighs:** what was I supposed to do? 

**bedhead:** oh, idk.. TAKE YOUR MAN BACK?!

 **thighs:** he's not mine

 **sexy kouhai:** why can't romance be simple?

 **bokkun:** seems pretty simple to me

 **thighs:** everything is simple to you

 **bokkun:** DAAAAAAAAD

 **bedhead:** ouch

 **sexy kouhai:** lol

 **thighs:** that's what you get for intruding on my love life 

**bokkun:** FINE ILL GO

 **bedhead:** see ya later, bro

 **bokkun:** bye bro

 **sexy kouhai:** I pity the setter squad  
**sexy kouhai:** they have to deal with your crazy asses

 **bedhead:** my ass is very serious, tyvm

 **thighs:** I'm not even going to try

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
2:51 pm

**Salt™:** I didn't know the owl guy was capable of using such big words

 **bokkun:** HEY! I CAN USE BIG WORDS!

 **Salt™:** sure

 **kita-san:** I can sense his sarcasm from here

 **Salt™:** good

 **bokkun:** SO MEAN!

 **Salt™:** god, you're so whiny

 **kita-san:** You seem more on-edge than usual, Futakuchi. Did something happen?

 **Salt™:** it's Valentine's Day

 **bokkun:** ISN'T THAT A GOOD THING?

 **Salt™:** ew, no  
**Salt™:** Valentine's Day is the worst holiday of the year, if you can even call it that

 **kita-san:** You can act like it's a regular day, if it bothers you that much

 **Salt™:** gee, wish I had thought of that

 **kita-san:** No need to be rude, I was just trying to help

 **Salt™:** whatever

 **sexy kouhai:** my best friend senses were tingling

 **Salt™:** I'm not your best friend

 **sexy kouhai:** how did you know I was talking about you, then?

 **Salt™:** I hate it here

 **sexy kouhai:** nah, you love me

 **Salt™:** I'm leaving

 **sexy kouhai:** aww, not again!

 **bokkun:** im confused...

 **Salt™:** when are you not?

 **sexy kouhai:** I thought you said you were leaving?

 **Salt™:** shut up

 **sexy kouhai:** nah

 **kita-san:** What are you confused about, Bokuto?

 **bokkun:** i thought Futakuchi and Terushima didn't like each other, was I wrong?

 **Salt™:** oh my god

 **sexy kouhai:** XDDD

 **kita-san:** I would also like to know why you are suddenly getting along

 **Salt™:** we aren't "getting along", nothing's changed

 **sexy kouhai:** Futa's gonna kill me for this, but we've been friends for a while  
**sexy kouhai:** since before the chat, actually

 **bokkun:** FUTA?! YOU EVEN HAVE NICKNAMES?!

 **Salt™:** you're dead next time I see you, fuckface

 **sexy kouhai:** worth it

 **kita-san:** Why did you not want us to know about your friendship?

 **sexy kouhai:** he was worried about his "reputation" or something

 **Salt™:** no, I just didn't want people like Oikawa and Kuroo to start their horrid teasing

 **bokkun:** as a victim of my bro's teasing, i can confirm that that was a good idea

 **Salt™:** wow, you didn't sound like an idiot for once

 **sexy kouhai:** now, now, Futa

 **Salt™:** I will actually fucking kill you

 **kita-san:** Is this how your friendship always works?

 **sexy kouhai:** yea, pretty much

 **bokkun:** I CAN SOUND SMART!

 **Salt™:** anyone who regularly uses caps is immediately checked off as stupid

 **kita-san:** That was a bit harsh, Futakuchi

 **Salt™:** eh

 **sexy kouhai:** you better watch yourself, Futa  
**sexy kouhai:** I've got a shit-ton of blackmail on you that I can now use to my full advantage

 **Salt™:** I hate it here

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
7:38 pm

**oinks** changed their name to **out of order**

**trash:** You are not a machine, Oikawa. You can not be "out of order".

 **bedhead:** that's probably his way of saying that he doesn't want any more of our dumbassery blowing up his phone tonight

 **kita-san:** Yes, so we should all sign off for the day

 **trash:** Understood, good bye.

 **bedhead:** see ya

\---

** The captains of GAY **   
10:15 pm

**bokkun:** GUYSSSSS  
 **bokkun:** I CANT SLEEP AND KAASHI HAS BEEN IGNORING ME ALL DAY

 **thighs:** Bokuto, that's not our problem

 **bokkun:** BUT DAAAAAAD

 **thighs:** no, you can whine about it in the morning

 **bokkun:** FIIIIIIIIINE

 **thighs:** thank you

 **bokkun:** hmph

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is late, I'm sorry! I was trying to get my setters' night thing up! It is out now, so check it out if you haven't already!


	6. Not an update, but an apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry

Hi.

I know, I know, I've been gone for a long time. I'm sorry for not updating for almost a month. Things have been.. busy, to say the least. I doubt it'll get any better, honestly. It's nearing finals time, so school is getting harder. I've also kinda run out of ideas. So.. yea. I might update everything soon, but I really don't know. Please be patient, and don't give up on this story. 

Love you all, have a good day!


End file.
